unautremonde: (Default)
Title: Chase
Series: Souviens-toi de moi, 2/3
Genre: AU
Pairing: Dom/Elijah
Rating: PG-13 (NC-17 for the whole series)
Summary: London, 1943. Dom has demons clinging to his skin and haunting him through his dreams.
Warning: none for this part.
Disclaimer: Obviously all lies, and I'm certainly not trying to pretend I know anything about these actors' real personalities and sexual preferences. It's all fiction, people.
Author's note: additional disclaimer and visual aids to be found here.
Thanks: to [livejournal.com profile] rynalwyn and [livejournal.com profile] shaenie for incredible support and betas, this story wouldn't be what it is without you.

“I’m Dom. And whether that is my real name or not doesn’t matter. What matters is what use you will have for it, pretty boy.” )

back to part one: Whisper -- on to part three: Remember
unautremonde: (Default)
Title: Whisper
Series: Souviens-toi de moi, 1/3
Genre: AU
Pairing: Dom/Guillaume
Rating: R (NC-17 for the whole series)
Summary: London, 1943. Dom has demons clinging to his skin and haunting him through his dreams.
Warning: violence, character death
Disclaimer: Obviously all lies, and I'm certainly not trying to pretend I know anything about these actors' real personalities and sexual preferences. It's all fiction, people.
Author's note: additional disclaimer and visual aids to be found here.
Thanks: to [livejournal.com profile] rynalwyn and [livejournal.com profile] shaenie for incredible support and betas. This story wouldn't be what it is without you.

“You did well, Dominic, we will break him soon.” )

on to part 2: Chase
unautremonde: (Default)
Pairing: Dom/Billy, hints of Elijah/Orlando
Genre: AU
Rating: PG-13, I'm not sure. There is some sex.
Summary: set in some nameless American University, Dom is a foreign student/TA, Billy is a guest teacher for the foreign languages department.
Author's Note: for Rynalwyn, for her birthday. Thanks to Lilli for giving me her first honest impressions on this; I tried to take your advice into account, dear. Also, I know the title sucks (Megolas confirmed that it was kind of a put off), but I could not change it. This was the story's title all along, and I think it fits. I hope you won't get too stuck on it, lol.
Disclaimer: Did I mention AU? Yeah, so not true at all, then. Fiction, not implying anything in the least.

Love like mayonnaise )
unautremonde: (nc17)

Pairing: Various, let yourselves be surprised. ;-)

Rating: NC-17, because some are, and some aren't. But it's better to be safe.

Author's Note: These are drabbles, meaning they're very short 100 words ficlets, dealing with various pairings and subjects. Hope you enjoy them.:-)

Drabbles )

unautremonde: (Default)

Pairing: DM/VM

Rating: Rish, to be on the safe side, but probably more like PG-13.

Summary: Wherein Viggo swallows his words and Dom laughs a lot.

Disclaimer: Not true, fiction, totally made up, no harm intended, I'm not right in my head anyway, so don't take me seriously when it comes to what these guys do when they're not filming.

Kink )

unautremonde: (nc17)

Author: Jem (me, duh)

Pairing: Billy Boyd/Dominic Monaghan

Rating: NC-17

Warnings: this deals with porn. Not that I would normally think it heeded a warning, but... so yeah, porn, so tacky and gross and rude words and imagery. So yeah. Warning for that.

Summary: Billy's got a thing for porn...

Disclaimer: All I own is the computer this was typed on. You know, like... I don't own these guys. I don't know anything about them, don't want to imply anything about them... just... I don't know, look under the word fiction in your dictionaries.

Author's Notes: A big thank you to quite a few people. First and foremost, aelane for holding my hand while I was writing this. Also, this story is dedicated to you, a long time overdue promised gift. Hope you enjoy it. It's changed a tiny bit since last time. Second of all, thanks to my Lilli for betaing it, just like old times. I love you and you're the best and heeeeeeeeee! You're coming next week! Third, devilherself because heeeeee! Loved your comments and they helped. One little thing Ididn't change because I had no clue was that thing about Billy being right-handed or left-handed. I figured he'd be doing this on a borrowed standard computer with the mouse on the right. *shrugs* But that part made me laugh. *winks* And last but not least, thanks to ffenest. Your pointers turned out to be wayyyy helpful, thanks.

It's just porn, mum... )
unautremonde: (Default)

Title: Ink
Rating: PG
Pairing: none as this is more gen than slash. Elijah piece.
Summary: From Queequeg to Boromir, Elijah has a hard time letting things go.
Disclaimer: the only thing I really know for sure is that I know nothing. Pure fiction from A to Z.
Author’s Note: For baranduin who asked for David/Elijah or Bean/Elijah, and who hoped this picture could be included somewhere in the story. I managed only one out of three but I hope you like it! Happy Valentine’s day!
Thanks to: everyone I whined to while writing this, rynalwyn, sparktastic and abundantlyqueer who offered encouragements and suggestions, and azrhiaz for both making the Slashy Valentine happen in the first place and taking the time to beta this.

Ink )
unautremonde: (Default)

Author: Jem (me, duh)

Pairing: none so far. Cate character piece.

Rating: I'll say PG-13, but only because I typed "sex" in there somewhere and I'm always cautious. It's really probably more like G, though.

Warnings: uh... I don't know. Nothing really. Mentions of lesbianism, mentions of het...

Summary: It had never really occurred to her to think of herself as anything other than straight...

Disclaimer: I'm already physically sick, so it makes sense that I'd be mentally deranged as well. Didn't your mother ever teach you not to listen to the crazy strangers out there? Want candy?

In other words, none of this is true.

Author's note: Thanks to my Lilli for having a look at this. I know you didn't much enjoy it, but your pointers did help, so thank you. I love you and I miss you, by the way. Thanks also to devilherself for a very thorough and lovely beta. Your comments cracked me up, seriously. Re-reading them today actually cheered me up a lot. Not to mention helped me make this thing a bit better. So thanks to the both of you.

In the deep end... )

unautremonde: (Default)

Pairing: Dom/Orli.

Rating: PG13

Summary: Dom might be the best at selling ice cream, but when it comes to making it, Orlando's definitely got the touch...

Disclaimer: last time I checked, Orlando wasn't an ice cream shop owner. And Dom was no ice cream mogul. I think it's safe to assume that this never happened, then.
Author's Note: Thanks to Ryn, Aelane and Kia for putting up with me when I'm the most boring whiner ever. Thanks also to Ryn and Aelane for the quick read through. Thanks to Piran for coming to visit. You're always welcome any time, darling. This is for you. ;-)

I scream, you scream, we all scream for an ice cream... )

unautremonde: (Default)

Pairing: Orlijah
Rating: PG
Summary: dictionaries can give you paper cuts...
Disclaimer: the dictionary is mine but that's it. And the dictionary says... fiction noun 1 a product of the imagination. 2 an invented story. 3 a class of literatures containing such stories. What the dictionary says applies to this story.
Author's Note: for abundantlyqueer because she rocks, and because she's not happy right now. I'm hoping this will distract you. *smooch* Also, the definitions all come from The Oxford Paperback Dictionary.

Fixed )

unautremonde: (chris)
Pairing: Not quite Dom/Lance, more of a Dom piece, really.

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Dom is slowly turning into a fangirl...

Author's Note: Answer to the Two Lines challenge (the two lines in question are the lines under the title) and birthday fic for my dear Zarah, because she's the reason why I'm here today, lusting after both Dom and Lance. Happy Birthday, honey!
Thanks: to Aelane for the beta, Piran and Kia for being wonderful cheerleaders, and to Ryn for being ever so patient with me (wouldn't have done it without all of you). Thanks to Mary as well for finding info about Lance's production company for me.

Disclaimer: Gimme an F! Gimme an I! Gimme a C! Gimme a T! Gimme an I! Gimme an O! Gimme an N! F.I.C.T.I.O.N.! Fiction! Yay!

Fangirl )

unautremonde: (Default)

Pairing: Miranda/Liv

Rating: PG (or maybe PG-13 for a very small bit of making out)

Summary: wherein Miranda doesn't like to shop for certain kind of toys, whereas Liv enjoys playing with nail bed thingamebobs.

Disclaimer: I have never met Miranda or Liv, so I really wouldn't know whether they enjoy shopping for toys or not. Completely made up, baby. Though if anybody asks, the way Liv acts in this? Totally me when stuck in the middle of a toy store. Oh, and actually, I do own Smoochy. As in I have one here. With me. Now. *say hi, smoochy*... Ooooo, nice people with shiny white coats! Coming to take me away on an extended vacation! How nice!

Author's Note: written in exactly 55 minutes as an improv. Baggers gave me the pairing (Mir/Liv), the premise (a toy store), the genre (comedy/sweet, if I remember correctly), and a list of words (hackey sack, computer, catalogue, nail bed thingamebobs).

Come out and play )

unautremonde: (Default)
Pairing: Miranda/Liv (Heeee! First time writing girlslash! Heeee!)

Rating: PG

Summary: Wherein Liv isn't the sharpest crayon in the box.

Disclaimer: Since I've never been inside the make up trailer myself, I'll grudgingly admit that I don't think this happened. It could have, though, no? Right, no. This is fiction. Duh.

Author's Note: Improv written for the lj community contrelamontre. Attempted exercise in "show-not-tell". 30 minutes time frame. Title is French for "to burn".

Brûler )

unautremonde: (Default)
Pairing: Dom/Billy, implied Elijah/Orlando

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Billy thinks it might be "aperitif" time, Dom just wants Orlando to not rush things too much and ruin his appetite for the main course.

Author's Note: For the Lotrips Remix challenge, a remix of Jaq's Citrus. Huuuuuuuge thanks to Sheanie for the help and the beta. Wouldn't have done it without her. Thanks to Ghani and Meg, too. And all the wacky groping girls from AIM

Disclaimer: written for that remix thing. : Which means that not only do I not own the guys (pity, that), but I don't even own the original idea for the fic that inspired this. Basically, besides the keyboard this was typed on, not much is mine. Also, not true, pure unadulterated fantasy, nothing implied, no money made from this, just for fun. No one sue, ok?

Apéritif )
unautremonde: (Default)
Pairing: Dom/Dom/Dom/Dom...
Rating: PG with a side of crack.
Summary: Wham, bam! Dom's not in Kansas anymore.
Disclaimer: this is complete and utter crack. It's probably a step beyond fiction, with a good dose oof parody and it's all in the name of fun. So nothing implied besides the fact that I'm obviously not right in my head.
Author's Note: for [livejournal.com profile] thepsychicclam on her birthday. Enjoy, love! Thanks to [livejournal.com profile] rynalwyn for cheering me along and for the read-hrough. You both rock. ;-)

Ad Nauseam... )
unautremonde: (Default)
Pairing: BB/DM
Rating: PG
Summary: Wherein Dom fights curiosity a lot, Billy's obviously in need of luck, and Pandora should never have opened that damned box.
Disclaimer: Not true. Well, except for the bit about Pandora. Rumor has it she really did open that box. Stupid git.
Author's Note: Improv written for the lj community [livejournal.com profile] contrelamontre. Challenge was: quote must be included ("You can not miss what don't exist," The Divine Comedy), not actual words but at least the idea, and socks too. 45 minutes time frame.

Pandora's Box )
unautremonde: (Default)
Pairing: Orlando Bloom/Johnny Depp
Summary: Wherein Orlando's roaming pre-Oscars parties for beautiful French actresses' autographs, and Johnny Depp might be able to help with the French.
Disclaimer: Again, pure fiction. Never happened, most likely never will. I can dream, though. Which is what this story is: a dream. Or fantasy, if you prefer. Not real.
Author's Note: This was written as an improv for [livejournal.com profile] contrelamontre. 45 minutes time frame, words to be used were flash (as a verb), Oriental, mistranslation and intermezzo.

French Lessons )
unautremonde: (Default)
Pairing: OB/EW
Rating: PG 13
Disclaimer: Well, I did ask Santa for the boys, but... When I got up wednesday morning, all I found under the tree was the following letter:
"Dear Jem,
delusional naughty girls do not get Christmas presents. Try again next year.
Yours truly, Santa Claus."
So, I guess I still don't own them and can't make claims as to what their sexual habits should be are.
Author's Note: This fic is dedicated to [livejournal.com profile] megolas, who not only did an amazing job as our Secret Slasha Claus (heeeee!), this year, but also spent a lot of time listening to me whine on AIM. I hope you get better soon. Mwha! Also, thank you soooooooo much to [livejournal.com profile] hjartad for the impromptu beta. Oh, yeah, and last but not least, thanks to William for letting me borrow one of his titles and quotes. Bill, you rock. ;-)

Othello )
unautremonde: (Default)
Pairing: VM/OB, EW angst
Rating: PG 13
Summary: Wherein you'll find that nail biting is a filthy habit, and Sean Astin's not as clueless as he seems.
Disclaimer: Well, apparently, Elijah does bite his nails. So there. That part of the story is true. As for the rest... Yeah, you know the word: fiction, baby!
Author's Note: Written for [livejournal.com profile] zarah5's birthday. *smooch*. Happy Birthday, girl!

Stop That! )

November 2011

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